Gaaa, you're such a snob

Last week in a meeting, I was confronted with my least favorite type of person at the moment: a Twitter snob.  Believe me when I tell you, they are the WORST.  I was poo-pooed because of the number of followers I have.  In a meeting.  At work.  And then the following statement was said to me, "I spend all day on Twitter."  Um...do you remember this a work meeting, not happy hour?  Good for you and all your followers.  No need to snort your judgment at me.  Kathy does not approve.

There are all kinds of snobs out there, some I support, some I get very annoyed with.  So, in true Kathy fashion, I'll outline the worst kinds, and the ones I support.  You should know that the ones I support are the ones I agree with.  For I am a snob too.

THE WORST

1. Music snobs.  Seriously, we get it.  You only appreciate quality music.  You knew about that band way before they went mainstream.  Pop music annoys you, there's no musicality.  Yeah, yeah, yeah.  Got it.  I like pop music.  It's fun.  It's short for "popular."  You know who was considered pop musicians?  The Beatles.  And The Jackson 5.  You got something bad to say about Tito or Ringo?  No, I didn't think you did.  Just appreciate it for what it is.  
2. Wine/beer snobs.  We all know them.  They are annoyed by those of us who lack distinguished palates.    I didn't get to take Wine Tasting in college and I feel like that was my only shot.  Here is the thing, I actually applaud people who really know about wine.  But those of us who don't aren't losers or creetens.  We are from Oklahoma.  And our dad's drank Coors Light.  Beer snobs on the other hand reside in the north.  Where it always snows and the sun never shines.  Yes, I'm talking about Michigan.  If you order a Bud Light in Michigan, the record scratches and the room goes silent.  It's really quite ridiculous.  Michigan is apparently Miller Lite country.  Kathy stands firmly by her motto of "It's all yellow."
3. TV snobs.  I have had several friends who are TV snobs.  Or lack-of-tv snobs.  They say things like, "I don't have cable."  Or "I only watch Nat Geo."  Well good for you.  But I think that is dumb.  You aren't actually better than other people because you don't watch TV.  Frankly, I think it's weird.  Unless you are crunchy and granola and spend all your time outside with the squirrels.  In that case, you are better than me.  You'd be amazed what that magical box can teach you.  Embrace it.  Don't let all of Phil Farnsworth's hard work go to waste.

ACCEPTABLE SNOBBERY

1. Travel snobs.  I'm a travel snob.  I openly admit it.  It really comes out when I fly Southwest.  Why is lining up in numerical order so difficult for the general population?  They are numbers.  They go from smallest to biggest.  Someone should have taught you this in kindergarden.  The only way it could be easier is if your name was written on a piece of tape on the floor.  But if you haven't heard, times are tough, and we can't afford that.  So every single Southwest flight, there are people wandering around super confused about where to stand and where to go.  And these people always seem to cut in line.  You aren't allowed to cut.  No cutsies.  You should have learned that in kindergarden too.
2. Sports seats snobs.  Okay, here is the deal, this specific snobbery was hatched in the fact that I have been very lucky to be born into a family that loves sports and has season tickets to everything.  Yay family!  So when you get used to sitting close enough to hear the coaches cuss at the players, it is almost impossible to adjust to far-away seats.  Kathy has tried, and Kathy just cannot sit in the nosebleeds.  It causes her soul to die.  True story.  So I have a certain standard, and I refuse to give in.  There is only one small flaw in this snobbery... Kath doesn't have the funds to support such tastes.  Damn my champagne tastes on a Bud Light diet.  I tried watching my Cowboys once at a bar, but when I yelled, "Stop juking and just run forward!" loudly, everyone stared.  Even the bartender.  Whoopsie.  While Craigslist can be scary (see Lifetime) a bargain shopper such as myself can find a good deal on tickets.  Until I do finally win the lottery (fingers crossed) tracking down affordable good seats via the internets is in the cards for Kathy and Husband.  The only time I waiver on this standard is when I'm attending sporting events in which I could care less who wins.  I cheer for the home team with the locals.  Good times.
3. Shoe snobs.  Everyone should be a shoe snob.  It's what God would want.  Ugly shoes are bad.  Crocs are bad.  Shoes are the one thing in your closet that are guaranteed to fit, and that should make you feel good about yourself.  Unless you are victim to a growth spurt.  I keep hoping that I'll have another growth spurt.  I even measured myself in my office today.  I was waiting for my computer to update itself, I was listening to Adele and bored out of my mind (this was after hours so no need to report this to the authorities).  So I used my tape measure....still 5'8 1/2" I want to be 5'9".  I think I can then officially refer to myself as tall.  I'll keep you posted on my progress.  And in case you forgot what my original point was, it happens, shoes are important.  It's important to care about them.  Caring is sharing.

So there you go.  I ask this of you during National Friendship Week (it's not really National Friendship Week, but let's just all pretend) when someone doesn't know as much as you or like the same things you do, remember that they aren't wrong.  They are just different.  Different isn't bad, it's just different.  Maybe instead of hating on Twitter novices, you could just take them under your wing and be helpful.  Help those baby birds fly.  See what I just did there?  Twitter? Wings? Baby Birds?  Genius.