Mack the Knife

So Mack Brown got the knife.  The ax.  The ol' 86.  His walking papers.  The big ol' sayonara sweetheart.  Kind of a sad day, if you ask me.  I liked Mack.  He reminded me of that good ol' boy that you could drink beer with and before you parted ways, he'd slap you on the back and tell you how much he liked you.  Don't we all need more people like that in our lives?  I think we do.  (I don't know why I used 'ol three times in that paragraph.  I must be from good 'ol Oklahoma.  Yee haw).

Mack's firing was quite the topic of conversation in our house when the news broke.  First we discussed one possible candidate.

Kathy: Someone on Twitter just said Todd Graham (ASU head coach) would be a good choice.
Husband: He would be a good choice.  It would be great if they offered him the job and he turned it down.
Kathy: Sometimes you are so homerific, I wonder what it's like inside your head.
Husband: What?  I just said it would be great.  I didn't say I thought it would happen.
Kathy: Why in the world would he turn down Texas?  Are you crazy?
Husband: I just think it would be great for ASU, that's all I'm saying.
Kathy: Well, I think it would be great if Jesus stopped by our house tonight and blessed our child in person, but I don't think either of those things will happen.
Husband: You are hard to have conversations with.

Then we talked about another candidate.

Kathy: Maybe they will hire Gundy.  I would be fine with that.
Husband: I'm somewhat shocked at how much you dislike him.  I think he's done a really great job.
Kathy: He has.  But I haven't forgiven him for the stunt he pulled last year, flirting with other jobs.  Who tries to flaunt themselves as a top-level coach when you only win seven regular season games?
Husband: He was never going anywhere.  It was just a power play.
Kathy: And that's okay?  You'd be okay with your boy Todd Graham seeing who else wanted him?  What about if I did a little survey to see how many men were interested in dating me?  Just to see what the market was like?  Just to make sure that I was still a desirable candidate?  Would you be okay with that?  As long as I stayed?
Husband: Well...that's not  the same thing.
Kathy:   It's exactly the same. I couldn't be more spot on with my argument. He emotionally cheated on me, and I'm not over it.

Here are a list of candidates I would like to see hired for the job:

1. Les Miles.  He's so entertaining.  He eats grass.  He says crazy things.  We need more Les.
2. Harbaugh.  Either one.  Why?  Because they are so handsome.
3. Gruden. He's like half a notch less crazy than Miles, and I like that.
4. Bob Stoops.  Can you even imagine the amount of freak-out this would cause?  It would be so enjoyable to watch.  I asked Santa for this...fingers crossed.
5. Kevin Sumlin.  Because I'm all about controversy.
6. Mike Leach.  Bring back the pirate!  Can you imagine how mad that would make Craig James?  And I think we can all agree that an angry Craig James is good for America.

I'm always sad to see likable coaches go.  Hate to see the unlikable ones go as well, villains are good for sports.  I hope they are able to hire a good coach who is easy to hate, but not too good.  Let's not go win any national championships or anything....ain't nobody got time for that.