Well, that was awkward

My life is basically just a series of awkward moments being held together by OSU sporting events.  I just kind of stumble through life, wondering where the emergency exit is in every situation.  Like when Tiny Human yells, "That's a big man!" as a stranger walks by.  I just smile nervously and hope the big man is deaf too.

Or when Husband starts to tell stories that are supposed to be kept in the vault.  I pantomime the throat slitting motion in an attempt to make the story end.  And when it doesn't, I blurt out something unrelated.  I'm sure no one notices.

But today, I had a first as far as awkward moments go.  I ran into someone who unfriended me on Facebook.  Recently, I was talking with my real friends about being "friends" with people on the Book who you aren't actually friends with in real life.  And if, when you see them in public, either you or they won't say hello, maybe you should unfriend.  I never have this problem.  My 667 (thank you to my latest friend addition for getting me over the mark of the devil) friends are all my besties.  We are all super close, and I think we all know that.  I gave you a like just the other day.  This bond cannot be broken.

But from time to time, you lose one for one reason or another.  We'll call this one Stan.

I'm not even sure when Stan stopped being my online friend.  I can remember when I discovered it, though.  I got a message from another friend that said something to the effect, "Yo!  Have you seen those pictures of Stan??"  Seeing as I love being a voyeur, I clicked on over to Stan's page.  Alas...Stan and I had broken up.  And I never even got to say goodbye.

It's hard to pinpoint when we started to grow apart.  Maybe it's the fact that we haven't actually spoken in 18 years.  Or maybe he hates fun.  Who knows.  But this is America and Stan has that choice.  It's the wrong one, but nobody's perfect.

So I saunter into the gym at lunch and who do I see but Stan.  Crap.  Frickin' left-me-when-I-should-have-left-him-first Stan.  I didn't really know what to do.  As Tiny Human asks (45 times a day), which path do I take?  I could just be nice, say hello and rise above the fray.

Instead, I slapped him on the back and said, "Hey Stan.  I never liked you that much anyway."  And then I walked away smiling.

I didn't do that, but wouldn't that have been an amazing thing to do?!  I really, really wanted to.

Instead, I chose the mature path.  I pretended like I didn't see him.  Maybe he didn't notice me as we looked directly at each other and my eyes got very wide. Maybe people run away from him in awkward fear all the time.

But you know what they say, like a goldfish, you gotta just keep movin'.  (No one says that. This is awkward).