Catching up

Let's be honest, I've started this blog about eight different times in the last two weeks and for one reason or another I don't finish.  Whatever the opposite of "focused" is, that's me these days.  Scattered? Schizo? Lacking direction?  D. All of the above.  So for the sake of fun, I'll take you through the last few weeks and highlights.  And then starting next week, maybe I'll manage to put thoughts together in a reasonable manner. Deal?  Deal.

1. I'll have what Russell's having.  I have found myself eating at the same establishment as Russell Westbrook twice in the last six months. By proxy, I'm pretty sure this means I'm awesome.  I'm hip and cool and with it.  I've yet to work up the courage to speak to him, mainly because I've heard he's not that nice.  Forty four years ago I ran into Marky Mark in Vegas and asked for a picture.  He said, "I don't really think so."  To which I responded, "You don't think so?  Seriously?  That's your response?"  As you can see, I've yet to get over being scorned by someone much more famous than myself.  Later that night I met Michael Irvin.  Way nicer.  Which is why I watch NFL Countdown and not Wahlburgers.  I will never forget.
2. Bedlam baby.  Every time I think I'm ready to analyze this OSU basketball team, they throw another wrinkle in.  Saturday is Bedlam round 1.  I refuse to fall for the, "OU is struggling to find an identity and is regressing" story line.  Because every time I do, every single time, they come out and beat the pants off of us.  Harlem Globetrotter style.  It's infuriating.  So I'm setting the bar low.  Just split Bedlam.  Round 2 is on my birthday, and I've checked the rules of the universe, and they say my team can't lose on my birthday.  So that makes me feel better.
3. Graphene for $400, Alex.  I read an article about graphene a few weeks ago.  It is a pure carbon that is only one atom thick, It's faster, stronger, and cheaper.  Like Kanye.  It could revolutionize the semi conductor world.  Anyway, after I read the article, my thought process went something like this: I feel smarter!....I'm going to go to bed smarter than I started the day...I wonder if I'll ever be able to bring graphene up in a conversation...I am still not as smart as Dr. Sports (my freakishly smart friend)...why is she so much smarter than me?....how does she know all the things she knows?....If I read an article a day, and she never learns any new information, I will be caught up to her in two years....maybe I should work on being less competitive....yeah, like that is going to happen...I bet Dr. Sports doesn't know anything about graphene....Who am I kidding? She's a scientist.  She probably discovered it.
4. That's not proper English!  Tiny Human has taken to responding to things she doesn't like by saying, "No, I didn't."  Need an example? "Can you please eat your green beans?"  "No, I didn't!"  "We need to change your diaper."  "No I didn't!"  Two days ago, she switched it up by saying, "No, I sure didn't!"  I don't know what is more frustrating: her defiance or blatant disregard for proper grammar.
5. When will you be satisfied?  I had the pleasure of hearing a high school senior recite Martin Luther King Jr.'s I Have a Dream speech yesterday.  He did it completely from memory and it was wonderful.  It brought me to tears.  Because I'm ridiculous and I love equality.  While everyone focuses on the "I have a dream," part of the speech, the part that spoke to me was, "There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, when will you be satisfied?  We can never be satisfied..."  As God as my witness, I had to refrain from yelling out, "Yes!  Never!"  Like I said, I'm ridiculous.

So that's the Kath report.  Sorry I've been incommunicado...being patient with me, I'm a work in progress.