In a tribute to the amount of Sesame Street that is being watched in our home at the moment, today's Thunder recap is brought to you by the letter B.
Big Baby? As you all know, yesterday was Mother's Day. Following a nice lunch with my family, my mother and I settled in to watch the Thunder take on the Clippers. After the Thunder got off to a blistering start, the following conversation ensued.
Mom: Big Baby doesn't look too happy
Me: *pause* Ummmm....you know who Big Baby is?
Mom: Well, yes. Do you think I've been living under a rock?
Me: No... It's just that sometimes your knowledge surprises me. This is one of those times.
Mom: I think he's friends with Fifty Cents.
Me: It's Fiddy Cent. Just one. Don't ruin the moment, mom.
(** Editor's note: this story is so much better if you know the back story of my mom correcting me on how to pronounce Fifty Cent years ago).
Blake Griffin, BOOOO! I would like to go on record that I have never liked Blake Griffin. Ever. Since the time I became aware of his existence, I have disliked him. I liked him for about 15 seconds when he did a funny bit on the ESPYs a couple of years ago, but that was it.
Back in the day, I commented on a local message board (before I knew better) that he was a dirty player. I was attacked by the OU faithful for being jealous. Of course I was jealous. The Cowboys haven't had a legitimate center since Bob Kurland (that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but just go with me). I have never denied his talent, but that doesn't mean I have to like him. I have a sense for unlikable players. When I know, I know. For example: I have also never liked Joakim Noah. I didn't like him when he played at Florida and thought he needed to hold his jersey out away from his body. I know who you play for punk, you don't need to pull the jersey closer to the screen. I didn't like how he slapped the floor, because I think slapping the floor is moronic. And I just wish one time when someone was doing that and opposing player would tackle him. And I don't like his dumb hair. Or his dumb face. Or the dumb way he screams like a wild banshee. Down with Joakim Noah! Down, I say!
Back to my point: Blake Griffin is the enemy. And I'm glad to see we are all in agreement about this. I don't want to tell Scotty Brooks how to coach, but we need more Steven Adams annoying him. Pushing him to the brink. Give the people what they want!
Also, I taught Tiny Human to boo when Blake Griffin has the ball. Don't worry, I'm teaching her letters, numbers, colors, and the words to Ride 'Em Cowboys: all the basics. But it's important to learn sports villains early.
Baby gear. I'm a sports superstitionist (<-- not a word). I go with what works. If I am wearing a shirt, and the team is playing badly, I'll change mid-game. If we are in the midst of a losing streak, I'll change my gametime attire until we start to win, and then I stick with that. It's an evolving science. But I'm willing to do my part. When the playoffs started, I wore my James Harden Thunder shirt. Retro. As you can imagine, there is some bad juju associated with the Beard Gear, so I opted for something else. So far (until yesterday), I had found the winning combination.
But I'm pretty sure the Thunder's epic collapse yesterday can be placed squarely on the shoulder's of my child. She didn't thunder up, and I think that was the missing link. Sure, I dress her. And sure, it's up to me to make sure her Thunder outfits are clean. But we aren't talking semantics here, people. We are talking putting the team before oneself. And frankly, she just isn't cutting it. Pull your weight, kid. You're only 26 pounds, how hard can that be?
Okay, so let's meet back here tomorrow night. We'll all dress appropriately, hope that someone Tonya Harding's Chris Paul (kidding...kinda), and all say a collective prayer that after Steven Adams knocks Blake Griffin to the floor, he stands over him ala Chris Tucker in Friday and in the immortal words of Smokey says, "You just got knocked the **** out." Imagine, if you will, how amazing that line would sound coming from a Kiwi.
Make. It. Happen.
Amen.
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