Tuesday Tantrums (and other letters)

Happy Tax Day!  I was a good citizen this year and finished my taxes early...27 hours early to be exact.  Another year, another handful of cuss words as I write my check to the state of Oklahoma.  I think since I have to pay money every year, I should have a little more say in the legislation.  My first proposed bill is outlawing wind.  Next up, no more chewing gum for anyone.  If you can't chew quietly, you don't deserve the privilege.

So, let's jump right into this Tuesday edition of letters, shall we?

Dear Facebook Friends,

What gives?  What's with holding back on important information?  At no time have I seen people post about the without-warning-full-out-tantrums children aged 18 months throw. Why isn't anyone talking about this?  As of this weekend, I am the proud owner of a child who may or may not be possessed.  I thought tantrums were brought on by something actually happening, not just because.  I don't even know how to handle such occurrences, because I fail to understand why a reasonable person would throw themselves to the floor and scream at the top of their lungs because their bib is removed.  How about a little less talk of potty training, and more talk about what to do when your child's soul is taken over by the dark side.  That'd be great.

Sincerely,

Confused Parent

Dear Professional Wrestling,

Thanks for the trip down memory lane lately.  I've had more conversations about WWF and professional wrestling in the last week than I have in 25 years.  It's been fantastic.  I've reminisced about being a Hulkamaniac, the Saturday morning cartoon Hulk Hogan Rock n' Wrestling, Junkyard Dog, Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat, and G.L.O.W. (gorgeous ladies of wrestling).  And by reminisced, I mean I talked about them and Husband stared back in confusion.  Whatever.  I'm clearly a more well-rounded person because of my knowledge of Rowdy Roddy Piper and the sleeper hold.  

Whatcha gonna do, brotha?

Kath

Dear Oklahoma Weather,

Earthquakes, tornado warnings, 80 degrees and snow all within 48 hours?  Yawn.  Until you produce a typhoon, I'm underwhelmed.

Wall clouds and thunder sleet, 

Kathy

Speaking of thunder...

Dear Thunder,

I'm totally not worried.  So you lost to Jeff Withey and the walk-ons.  No big woo.  Everyone just remain calm, we've got them right where we want them.  It's almost playoff time, so you've got my full attention.  I think everything is going to be A-OK.  Unlike previous years, you aren't the hottest team going into the playoffs, and I think that's good.  Let's take the Tom Izzo approach to winning, it only matters if you win in the post season.  Let's just focus on making the following players cry over the next couple of weeks: Manu Ginobili, Tim Duncan, Mario Chalmers and Joakim Noah.  I realize that we necessarily play the last two, but my dislike for them is equal.

Fair weather fan at her finest,

K

Dear OSU baseball,

So I don't want to pin all my hopes and dreams on Bedlam baseball...but I'm pinning all my hopes and dreams on Bedlam baseball, of which we get a preview tonight. My long and difficult plight as an OSU fan is well-documented.  I need the blood moon and the stars to align and give me a big fat series sweep.  No mercy.  As they say on Mortal Kombat: Finish them! (<-- okay, that's not an exact quote, just go with me).  Here's to letting the Hulkamania run wild.

Go Pokes!

K Rath