If you know my hate of the overly, misused frequency of the word literally, you'll know just how serious I am about this post. You guys, I'm watching Netflix's Making a Murderer and I literally can't even.
A few days ago, I saw all kinds of people all abuzz about this new documentary. Maybe it's not actually new, but it's new to me. A true crime documentary, nonetheless. To which I said, "Hmmm, sounds like a long version of Dateline, I'm totally in. Let's do this."
See, I have a soft spot for true crime. And for documentaries. This was made for me! Santa came early, y'all. Oddly enough, when I was pregnant with Tiny Human, I read this book about the most famous unsolved crimes. I think you're supposed to listen to classical music and crap, but not me. I'm all, "maybe I can get the baby's heart rate up by scaring myself!" Not wanting Small Fry to be left out, I've jumped feet first into this disturbing story about Steven Avery in nowhere, Wisconsin and basically how he is a victim of the most absurd injustices by the legal system you could ever imagine. Or maybe he's guilty. I DON'T KNOW!
I had the following conversation with Husband about this 10-part documentary: (I used a lot of capitalization to highlight the drama of the situation).
Kathy: OH MY GOD!
Husband: *comes around the corner* What's up?
Kathy: I need a support group while watching this show! It is stressing me out!
Husband: *Laughs*
Kathy: It's not funny. This is exhausting. I mean, now there is a kid who is quite literally mentally slow who is just confessing to stuff....AND I CAN'T HANDLE THIS.
Husband: *shrugs*
Kathy: I'm so worked up, I sat here and considered sending a strongly worded letter to the public defender questioning him on if this is really how he does his job. I DON'T EVEN KNOW THESE PEOPLE!
Husband: *laughs*
Kathy: WHY AREN'T YOU TAKING THIS SERIOUSLY?! I'm really stressed out!
Husband: Maybe you should stop watching it.
Kathy: WHAT?! I can't stop now. I have to know that this ends happy. That good outweighs evil. But this guy is probably in jail. Or has been put to death. Because this is terrible and I can't turn away. And I have SIX EPISODES TO GO!
Husband: well....
Kathy: I need you to please start watching it. Please. I need someone to talk to about it.
Husband: Mmmm....seeing how you are reacting, I don't think that's going to happen.
Kathy: FINE! I'm on a lonely island of stress.
I don't want to spoil it and I will place a plague upon your house if you ruin it for me, but if there is anyone out there who is watching, let me know. Send up a smoke signal. I'm seeking solidarity. I've been thinking about starting a book club, but in the meantime, I just need someone to talk to about Making a Murderer. Or better yet, you binge watch the first four episodes and fax me when you've caught up. If you need support in those first few episodes, just call out my name, and you know wherever I am, I'll come running. The emotions are still very raw, I can help you through this.
On an unrelated note, I'd like to take a moment to recognize myself for flawlessly working James Taylor lyrics into this blog. I also used the word precipice in conversation today, and I'm 90% I used it correctly. Basically, I'm winning at everything right now. Everything but being emotionally equipped to handle a television show. As the kids say, the struggle is real.
