Kathy: One of the members of Kris Kross died.
Husband: Oh really?
Kathy: Yeah. Really sad. I don't know the difference between them, but I'm upset. They don't know what happened, just that he was found unresponsive.
Husband: That's wiggedy, wiggedy, wiggedy, wack.
Kathy: Too soon. *exits the room*
Can we all collectively pour a little out for one of the Chris's? As I blogged about long ago, Kris Kross was the first poster I had up in my room. It hung on the back of my door. I even wore my pants backwards once, just to try it out. Whatever, I was a weird kid. Stop judging me.
I mentioned back in October that I was part of a leadership class. In said class, we were all required to give bios of ourselves at some point. I was signed up for the next to last class, so I had months to prepare and think about what I wanted to say. I went back and forth. Who is Kathy? What do people need to know about her? It was quite a struggle. When I finally got up to reveal all the secrets that make me, me, I mentioned that I loved rap music. The filthier the better. For some reason, this made quite the impact on several class members. Guess they didn't know how ghetto I really am. I suppose my cardigan sweaters and affinity for LOFT clothing threw them off.
So, I was asked by one of my friends from the class to write a blog about rap. What better day to write such a blog, than on the day following the passing of one of the Chris's.
I'm sure you are asking yourself, what do you look for in an artist or song when it comes to rap, Kathy? Well, I'm happy to share my evaluative process.
Clever Lyrics: This doesn't need much explanation. I like witty, clever writing. The best out there are Ludacris, Eminem, Tupac (RIP), Wiz Khalifa, and Jay-Z.
Raunchy/Offensive lyrics: I don't know what is wrong with me, but I love offensive things. If it's shocking and makes you catch your breath, I put it on repeat. I think, in general, people take things too seriously. Listen to Too $hort and loosen up a little. I've also always enjoyed the shock value of me knowing all the lyrics to very inappropriate songs. Proper young ladies don't have Easy E played at their weddings...I did.
Fight Music: Sometimes you just want to listen to something aggressive. Okay, maybe YOU don't. But I do. I love that certain rap can make you want to punch a stranger. Just kidding, I would never punch a stranger. But I do like aggressive music, and I thank DMX and Eminem for providing it. Subsequently, they are both crazy, but who am I to judge? Do your thing, boi.
As you can see, my tastes are old school. I just don't like what the current guys are bringing to the game. (I don't actually talk like this normally, you know, because I'm a 30-something white lady from Oklahoma, but I want this blog to be authentic). While Lil' Wayne is a pretty good writer, I hate his voice and I think he is a punk. And Drake, I like him. Not as much as Amanda Bynes (good Lord), but I can't really get over the fact that he is both Canadian and a former Degrassi cast member. Definitely not hard.
So, if you have any suggestions for what I should be listening to now, let me know. Just know that Tupac is #1 in my heart. As he once said, I've got love for my brother, but we can never go nowhere unless we share with each other. We got to start make changes. (<--that line doesn't actually apply to this blog at all, but it is from one of my favorite songs and one of the only ones I could think of without cuss words). Thug Life.
