...Get the wish I wish tonight. I have a few wishes/requests that I'd like to put out there to the universe, please do your part on getting my message to the masses. Please, thank you, and tickles. Just so you all know, I've started adding "tickles" to random phrases. Not only is it fun and sun-shiny to say it, it also throws people off. It's important to keep people on their toes.
I think we all know that my main wish is for OSU domination this football season, but I'll save that particular blog for right before the season starts. I like to openly blog to the heavens/God. But not in a blasphemous way. So I will just let you know that my current wish is for it to be next week, RIGHT NOW. This may be the longest month of my life. Come on already September...what is the hold up? I am honestly jonesing for football. This weekend, the only sports on TV were replays of preseason NFL or Little League World Series. How's a girl to choose? Gross. So I watched Billy the Exterminator. Last night, while I was at a meeting, Husband texted me to let me know that Billy was chasing a javelina in Arizona. That's how desperate things have become in our home. Where is Doc Brown when I need him? Maybe I'll just build a ginormous sling shot in my back yard and fling myself into next week. Or maybe not. I haven't decided.
My next wish is a serious one. I wish that people wouldn't use Facebook as a way to complain, telemarket, and make insensitive political statements. Why can't everyone just be funny? Facebook should only be used to be funny and put up pictures. Preferrably funny pictures. All I ask is for you to stop and think, "Will this status update cause people to smile or frown?" Aim for smiles. Stop giving people wrinkles. And just for good measure, add the phrase, "Go Pokes!" to the end of it.
And my final wish (because everyone knows you only get three) is for healthy food to be addictive and yummy. Because currently, it is not. How do I rewire my brain to think, "Yes! Cauliflower!" instead of, "Yes! Salt!" I love salt. It is one of my favorite things in the whole world. Sometimes I dream about installing a saltlick in my office. But then people would think I was crazy, and I've fooled you all for this long, might as well keep it up. As we all know football season is 10 long days away, and I'm making a push to get into my best game shape. Trying to get back down to my playing weight. Just kidding, I just like to use that phrase. My male coaching friends use it, and I don't like to be left out. The last time I "played" a sport, not counting intramurals, was in 8th grade. So I suppose my playing weight is rooted in 1993. Looks like I'll need to get braces and a bad perm too...gosh, there's so much to do in only 10 days! Remind me what my point was again? Oh right, my wish for carrots and celery to be exciting. How am I going to make this happen? I need a one-on-one with Guy Fieri. That guy makes some really dumb stuff seem exciting.
One more wish, for good measure...I wish this blog was more interesting/entertaining. I had good intentions, but after rereading, I fell short. I blame the carrots.
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